"Rules of Combat"

Making my way through my news feed on FaceBook (trying to put off at least half of what I should be doing), I came across a blog post by xbradtc concerning the second fatal accident at ATAC in the past few months (the first, of course, being Lex).

It was an interesting overview of just what that company does and why it's work is so  important. And a reminder that bad things sometimes do happen to good people. And good companies. Just because.

Having read that, I hopped around the blog a bit and landed on "Rules of Combat". Too numerous to count (okay, there's actually 126 - with many more in the Comments), they're also too good and too funny not to share.

Here are a few of my personal favourites:

1. Friendly fire – isn’t.

2. Recoilless rifles – aren’t.

3. Suppressive fires – won’t.

21. The important things are always simple.

22. The simple are always hard.

23. The easy way is always mined.

24. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.

25. Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.

26. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.

27. When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.

28. Incoming fire has the right of way.

31. If the enemy is within range, so are you.

32. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

41. When both sides are convinced they’re about to lose, they’re both right.

44. Fortify your front; you’ll get your rear shot up.

52. Sniper’s motto: reach out and touch someone.

53. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.

56. It’s not the one with your name on it; it’s the one addressed “to whom it may concern”     you’ve got to think about.

67. One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.

71. The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.

72. The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon’s operator.

76. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

89. The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.

96. If your flank march is going well, the enemy expects you to outflank him.

97. Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.

98. Odd objects attract fire – never lurk behind one.

99. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.

105. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away, and your canteen always lands at your feet.

112. What gets you promoted from one rank gets you killed in the next rank.

116. If you need an officer in a hurry take a nap.

119. If at first you don’t succeed, then bomb disposal probably isn’t for you.

120. Any ship can be a minesweeper . . . once.

121. Whenever you lose contact with the enemy, look behind you.

122. If you find yourself in front of your platoon they know something you don’t.

125. When accused, admit nothing, deny everything, and file counter-accusations

Now go read the rest.

Legal Edumucation

It looks like the South Shore Regional School Board finally got themselves some.

This story has received so much play over the past week that I seriously considered not wasting my life time with it, but ... really, I couldn't resist.

Not when I've waxed poetic (or not) so many times before on exactly this sort of thing. (Ah, the good old days ... the fun we would have had with this at Lex's. But I digress.)

"Whazzup now?", you ask.

Let me see ... how to explain this?

Oh, I don't know. What say we just cut right to the stupidity?

The dispute arose after Grade 12 student William Swinimer was suspended from his school in Chester Basin for continuing to wear a shirt with the slogan, ``Life is wasted without Jesus.''

He says on his Facebook site that he did it to stand up for the rights and freedoms guaranteed in the Constitution.

Pynch-Worthylake says Swinimer and his pastor have agreed to take part in the debate that will look at how to ensure students' rights are not violated, while protecting other students from criticism.

She says it's not clear what the school will do if Swinimer wears the shirt when he returns to classes Monday.

Pynch-Worthylake said the school tried working out a solution with Swinimer before suspending him.

However, the 19-year-old says the school’s disciplinary action infringes on his right to freedom of religious expression.

“I do a lot of witnessing in school,” he said. “People talk to me and they ask me about my religion and I tell them.”

That has got him sent to the principal’s office in the past, Swinimer said.

“They say that it’s hate speech and that it hurts people’s feelings, but I don’t hate anybody.”
However, Pynch-Worthylake said the t-shirt's wording offends some people at the school because it tells them their beliefs are wrong.

“So let's recap, shall we?

A 19-year-old teen likes to take wear his favourite blankie T-shirt to school. Which just happens to read "Life is Wasted Without Jesus".  Apparently this T shirt makes at least some of the staff and students very, very unhappy. So unhappy that he is repeatedly asked not to wear said shirt. And when he doesn't heed these requests, he is given in-school suspensions. Repeated in-school suspensions.  Until this last 5-day out-of-school suspension given last week.

At which time he is warned, in no uncertain terms, that if he wears the T-shirt to school again, he will could be suspended for the rest of the year. The kid is in Grade 12. Hence, a suspension for the rest of the year means he would fail to graduate this year.

Want to hear the school board's reasoning in this regard?

If it said My Life is Wasted Without Jesus, that would be fine” because it expresses a personal belief, she said.

But the T-shirt he wore went further by telling non-Christians their lives are wasted, she said.

The school has asked Swinimer to replace it with a shirt that communicates his Christian faith without violating others’ beliefs, but he has refused, Pynch-Worthylake said.

Uh huh.

So it's okay to wear a shirt that says "My Life is Wasted Without Jesus"  but because the kid's shirt dares to state that "Life is Wasted Without Jesus", that might make someone else feel bad. And that's not just a problem.

Nope. It's A. Problem.

This whole thing is ridiculous in my mind but what really got me going on the subject was a news story last week stating that the Board intended to consult with a "human rights expert" on this issue.  I can only assume that they found someone with half a clue about human rights law, which is the reason they now say the kid can wear the T-shirt to school.

Really? Without a rest-of-the-year suspension?

Sure. With a little bit of back-tracking, of course.

“For us, it never really was about the one shirt,” Pynch-Worthylake said Friday.

Right. Gotchya.

Now, I realize that this kid might well have some other issues (around proselytizing witnessing to his peers). And I can fully understand how that might cause some problems at the school. But I think the Board was pretty clear in just about every news story - they wanted the shirt gone, it was wearing the shirt that got him suspended and would result in a further, harsher suspension.

So tell me, about that human rights edumucation. Just what will it take to get this simple concept through people's heads?

Listen carefully, class, I do not want to have to say this again.

And, yes, there will be an exam.

1. Although there is a right not to discriminated against (on certain enumerated grounds), there is no right not to offended.
2. And, as I've said before "... rude and insensitive remarks do not constitute discrimination. They are simply rude and insensitive remarks. Period. Full stop."

I know, I know. My snarkinesss is showing, Just a wee bit. My apologies but it's been a bit of a long life.

But seriously, people, should you doubt what we face .... yes, I do realize it's the "media", but please, I do expect somewhat better in Canada. The CTV Atlantic News ran a poll* the other day asking what people thought about this issue. 

The three choices looked something like this.

• It's okay. Everyone has the right to wear whatever they want to school. It's free speech.
• Religious messages are okay in school as long as they don't discriminate against another religion.
• No religious messages at all should be allowed at school.

Anybody see a problem with these choices?

The closest one that worked for me, personally, was No. 2. But that implied stated that a religious message could "discriminate" against another religion. And, frankly, I can't see how that could work. At any rate, it certainly didn't apply in this case.

Oh well, it's nice to see that at least some people in our Province are imbued with the least common sense of all. Which, by the way, would include a national atheists’ organization, the Atlantic Jewish Council, the Islamic Association of Nova Scotia and a provincial opposition leader.

Heh.

* For anyone truly worried about the state of "free speech" in Nova Scotia, you should be happy to know that close to 75% of the respondents to that CTV poll picked either No. 1 or 2, above. And the majority picked No. 1.

Today?

Today's the day. It's here. It. Has. Arrived. Most definitely.

I think.

Yeah, I may have been somewhat ambivalent with the concept (let alone overwhelmed in the part of my life that requires the actual "doing") of applying for guardianship of the Blue Jay.

Don't get me wrong. I know I have to do it.

My own ... ambivalence (and I'm really not sure what that is all about - ambivalence from She Who Preaches the Need to Seriously Consider and Decide How to Manage the Legal Relationship with Your Adult Child?) aside, it needs to be done.

Sooner. Rather than later.

And yet, somehow, She Who Created a Legal Guardianship Kit So Families with Absolutely No Legal Experience, Background or Training At All Can Apply for Guardianship Without Incurring the Cost of a Lawyer has managed NOT to do anything (and let's be clear here, I mean ANYTHING) about it in the past five weeks since the Blue Jay turned 19.

But having one big at-the-last-minute-total-surprise project off my plate (or as far off the plate as I can possibly make it go - after a presentation to the Camp's Board of Directors last evening I refuse to think about it any more right now ... uh uh, nope, you can't make me) and having an entire week before being scheduled to make a presentation (that I am totally unprepared for, by the way) to the Student Services Co-ordinators from around the Province ... I mean, really, what excuse could I possibly have for not starting the paperwork today?

Other than the fact that I desperately need to market my new business more ("more" as in so I have some actual work because I don't have any at the moment) after having worked the last day for my 12+ year client last week? But, hey, let's not get sidetracked here.

Right. Exactly. That's what I thought. No excuse. None.

But first, first I really need a cup of coffee. Then I will check my email again. Because you never know, there might just be something important there. And maybe Facebook, too, because ... you know ... it's Facebook.  'Nuff said.

But then, then I am going to be all over it. Like flies on honey. Like a rug on the floor. Like, like ... wow, I'm tired and those are so bad it's a true blessing for all of us that I can't think of any more.

But you get the point, right?

Cuz I'm going to do this. I am. Honest.

* Okay, sure, it's entirely possible that I could just be valiantly trying to convince myself here. But, then again, it is my blog. And I can cry if I want to. Right?

PS I am seriously considering adding a new label to the blog. How does "Pathetic" sound?

Beer and Skittles, Anyone?

Something to brighten up your day.

Courtesy of Hogday over at The Lexicans.





Apparently, they have good beer over there too. Not that I would know, of course ...

UPDATE: Actually this strikes me as strangely apropos my comment of the other day ... "Be careful what you ask for. You just might get it".

Still Missing

Time goes on. As does life, doesn't it?

And although time doesn't really heal all wounds, it does tend to provide a protective coating, a scab, if you will. Which, I suppose, is why it hurts so bad if and when that scab, for whatever reason, gets ripped off.

And, along the same vein, Facebook is, of course, Facebook.

And so it is that I receive a notification every time a friend posts on the Neptunus Lex Super Secret FB Page (first rule of the Neptunus Lex Super Secret FB Page - don't talk about the Neptunus Lex Super Secret FB page). Meaning I spend a fair bit of time on Lex's page, keeping up with what's going on.

But as the talk, in general, moves to being less and less about Lex and more and more about other items of "general interest" (defining the term "general interest" to mean of interest to those with a military and/or aviation backgrounds/fixations), it becames less and less satisfying.

It didn't happen immediately, of course. I followed what was being posted and found find a lot of it interesting. But after a while (defined as last Wednesday, I believe), I came to realize that the Neptunus Lex Super Secret FB page was no longer really doing it for me.  I was starting to miss Lex. Again.

I say "again" because, as I noted earlier, time does tend to dull wounds, eventually, in its own way. And life goes on. But this past Wednesday, I found myself "needing" more Lex. And so it was that I headed over The Lexicans blog.

I haven't involved myself a whole lot with that blog. Sure, I read there. Occasionally. But I haven't posted and really (at least for now) feel no need to. I guess what I am trying to say is that although I know it's there, although I "know" most (if not all) the bloggers and I visit occasionally, I don't feel any real connection with the blog. To which one might reply that we all grieve in our own ways. And, for whatever reason, the Neptunus Lex Super Secret FB page had been enough for me. Up until this past Wednesday.

So. Finding myself at the blog, I could have started reading backwards from the most current post, in what would be my usual manner. But I wasn't looking for that. I was looking for Lex. So, instead I only followed the links for "The Daily Lex" posts, moving backwards with the intent of finding my way back to the last one I had read on one of my previous visits.

"The Daily Lex" - some good soul (Todd) has taken it upon himself to find a post Lex has written for every date and post a link to it. With close to 10 years of writing (usually multiple posts on any given day), there are lots of choose from, of course. But that's the job role Todd has taken on for himself. Good man.

Back to Wednesday. I found myself reading these randomly chosen posts of Lex's. And while initially (momentarily) it quieted that need, that craving to hear Lex's voice again, it wasn't long before what looked like a hit on the good idea meter landed solidly on the bad idea meter. Because after that initial "Lex fix", it didn't take too long for the morose to return.

I went to the blog because something was missing but not long after finding what I sought, it started to hurt again. Strange, I wasn't hurting when I went to the blog. I was just searching for something ... missing ...even though I wasn't sure exactly what "it" was. But it wasn't long after finding what I was after that something changed. A dark cloud fell across the sun.

But sucker for punishment brave soul that I am, I kept on reading The Daily Lex. Going back pages and pages. Surprised at how long it had been since I had visited The Lexicans. I never did find my way back to where I had left off, not before life called me back to the present. Things to do, donchya know.

Like a good soldier, I returned to my life although I couldn't tell you for the life of me tell you now what it was that called me back to reality that day. Perhaps just the knowledge that I had been hiding out (and away from what was in front of me) for too long.

But when I returned to the daily grind it was with a definite sense ... the awareness at a very deep level that Lex is still missing. And that I continue to miss him, even when I'm not consciously aware of it.

Also came the realization that sometimes when we find what we're looking for, it hurts. That that old joke, "Be careful what you ask for. You might just get it." is often true. In other words, if I want to hear Lex's voice again, I must be prepared for that sadness to return. The ying and the yang. The give and the take. The good with the bad.

Something else that I realized the other day - I admire greatly those bloggers who, having allowed their blogs to go silent and dark in the days when Lex's voice was with us, have become reinvigorated and taken on the challenge to pick up where Lex left off and put their voices out there once again.

But, for whatever reason, that just doesn't seem to be me at the moment. I almost wish I could say that it's like this, that I can't bring myself to write of other things yet because I still miss Lex too much. But that wouldn't be true.

It's not that I don't still miss him (I just admitted how much I do) but I'm sad to say that whatever it is that had kept me from blogging the way I once did (for the past year or more) is still the culprit. And although my thoughts are developing on that subject (initially - and for quite a while now - I blamed it one thing but now I'm starting to think it's more a combination of things), I haven't yet made it to a place where I know exactly what I will or won't (or can or can't) do about it.

I guess in the meantime I will just have to sit with that. Be okay with it. Let it develop as it will. After all, it's not like I have much choice now, is it?

On Final Approach

An absolutely beatitful post by Lex's close friend, FbL, over at Argghhh! The Home of Two of Jonah's Military Guys.

I thought I was through the worst of it (and I was) until I read her account of the funeral and reception and then I was right back where I was a few weeks ago. We will miss you, my friend, but not only did you live your life large and with a certain je ne sais quoi (that's French), you said farewell in the same way.

Nope, no passing on while snoring in a comfy chair for you. You left us doing what you loved, living your passions right up to the end. One last lesson for us all.

And one final toast to you. For strength. And courage.

Three Weeks On

It was three weeks ago today that the unthinkable happened.

It was three weeks ago today that the blogging world lost, in my humble opinion, one of it's brightest lights.

It was three weeks ago today that many, many people who had never actually met the man first felt the stinging loss of a good friend.

It was three weeks ago today that the United States lost not only one of its finest sons, but also one of its finest ambassadors to the rest of the world.

It was three weeks ago today that a wife lost her husband.

It was three weeks ago today that two daughters and a son lost their father.

People die every day, don't they? And it's sad of course, if and when we stop to think about it. We know that everybody has a family, that everyone is somebody's child, parent, sibling, spouse or friend.

But we don't think much about it unless and until it happens to someone we know. Then the standard words are "He was too young" or "She lived a good, long life" or, the perennial favourite, "at least he's not suffering anymore".

Capt. Carroll (Lex) Lefon, USN (Ret) was laid to rest today in Sandy Eggo, California.

And yet, there seems to be so much wrong with that statement. First of all, it's hard enough to think of Lex as even being "retired", let alone laid to rest. No, me thinks the man is still soaring in the sky somewhere, doing loops, and twists and turns (perhaps even a split S here and there), rushing up to feel the heat of the sun only to swoop over and fall earthward. And then start all over again. For the sheer joy that is in it.

If Heaven is that reward at the end of one's life, if it involves anything like eternal happiness and bliss, then I am comforted to know that Lex will be repeatedly strapping on his aircraft until the end of time.

But for those of us left behind, gravity-bound to the earth, it's been a long three weeks. A time of great sadness and longing, a time of forcing ourselves to turn our minds to family and work obligations while our chests hurt and our hearts are heavy.

The company of friends (again, generally, most whom we've never "met" in the conventional sense of the word) helps to dull a bit of the sting. We share our favourite stories and memories, often with a chuckle here and a tear there. But we know what we must do, we know that life is a gift and must be treated like the precious thing it is. Our family members, too, are gifts, we know and must be treated with the same high regard.

None of us know for certain how long we will be here. Perhaps the best we can do is enjoy each moment while we constantly cultivate our relationships, remaining open to new ones and never forgetting the lives that have truly deeply touched ours. Perhaps, with some luck, we will even do the same for another some day.

But, for now, three weeks later, it hurts. And the "missing" (whether it be in the form of the hole in the missing man formation, the empty chair at the solitary table or the hole that we know must be in the hearts of Lex's wife and children) can seem so huge, so empty, so sad. So eternal.

To Mary, Christopher, Ashley and Kate - I know chances are slim to none that you will ever read these words yet I feel compelled to share them. Your husband, your Dad touched so many lives around the world. Touched lives that I'm sure even he wasn't aware of. You know better than anyone else what kind of man he was and we can only thank you for sharing him with us. May it help you some tiny amount to even have the smallest sense of how many prayers are lifted heavenwards on your behalf.

After my Mom died a few years ago, a friend (whom, ironically enough, I never would have met but for Lex) told me that you don't get "over" these types of loss; you get *through* them. I have found her words to ring true. I still miss my Mom, some days desperately. And I know I always will. But life goes on. And on. And on. With its highs and its lows, its joys and its sorrows.

And, in my heart, I know that  Lex wanted for his family what my mother wanted for hers, in her absence - in her words, not to be sad, but for us to live our lives and enjoy them.

Three weeks on ... and the world still weeps.

The Watch

For many years,
This sailor stood the watch
While some of us were in our bunks at night, ...
This sailor stood the watch

While some of us were in school learning our trade,
This shipmate stood the watch
Before some of us were born into this world,
This shipmate stood the watch

In those years when the storm clouds of war were seen
Brewing on the horizon of history,
This shipmate stood the watch

Many times he would cast an eye ashore and see his family standing there,
Needing his guidance and help,
Needing that hand to hold during those hard times,
But he still stood the watch

He stood the watch for many years,
He stood the watch so that we, our families,
And our fellow countrymen could sleep soundly in safety,
Each and every night,
Knowing that a sailor stood the watch

Today we are here to say: "Shipmate . . . the watch stands relieved.
Relieved by those YOU have trained, guided, and lead
Shipmate you stand relieved . . . we have the watch!"

"Bo’sun . . . Standby to pipe the side . . . Neptunus Lex is going ashore!"

--H/T to Andy Niemyer - adopted from a traditional poem read at retirement ceremonies